Journal of Sacred Work

Caregivers have superpowers! Radical Loving Care illuminates the divine truth that caregiving is not just a job. It is Sacred Work.

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Rilke
I
f only we would let ourselves be conquered,
as things are overcome by a great storm,
we would expand in space and need no names.

-Rilke
   A Radiology transporter reaches out to touch the arm of a patient in pain. "Is there anything I can do for you?" she asks. But the patient has already received something apparently remarkable. "The moment the transporter touched me I began to feel better," the patient said later.  A housekeeper hears a delirious old man calling out for his daughter. She puts down her mop, walks into the room, and holds his hand. Almost immediately, he calms down and falls off to sleep. A nurse strokes the back of a tiny baby and energy moves through her to him. In none of these cases were any drugs administered. What happened?…

   I don’t know, of course, exactly how healers do it. But here’s
what I think. All the great healers seem to have
accomplished something that looks magical. What has really occurred is
that they have determined how to get out of the way and let God’s love flow through them. When they are healing, they let go of ego.
Jesus_healing
   Jesus never claimed to heal anyone himself. One of his best known sayings was, "your
faith has made you whole." Since Jesus knew it was not his earthly
body that was generating healing power he knew it was some greater power moving though him, even extending out to his cloak.
   Moses did not contend that it was his power that accomplished
miracles. He gave all credit to God. Muslims would say the same of
Mohammed and Buddhists of the Buddha.
   What does this teach the rest of us? That we have the capacity to act as channels for love. That we can be pathways for healing and, sadly, we can also be valleys though which passes the toxic fluid of hate.
   There are many other choices between these two extremes. But the remarkable message is the power within each of us to be channels of love (or of some other life energy) and that our energy affects the energy of others.

The Dance   It appears that some sort of vibration flows between some caregivers and some patients. It becomes a sort of dance requiring something from each: Love from the caregiver – need, openness and belief from the patient.
   A similar phenomenon may occur with artists. Musicians often say things like, "I didn’t really write the song, it just came through me – as if from thin air." I have had this experience in my own music composing. Just as God is always present, music seems to simply be there waiting, as an apple on a tree, waiting to be picked. My role is to become open to receiving what is already there – and then to apply some human energy in writing down what I hear.
   On a historic scale, this explanation is often offered about the genius of Mozart. He always said that his vast output of masterpieces were things that "came to him." Not that he created them, but that they seemed to appear to in his ears. The same was true of Beethoven who continued composing long after he was totally deaf. He was hearing the music from deep within.
   The hardest thing for caregivers is to know how to move out of the way of the light so it can pass through them. We know that trust helps. We know that cultivating a garden of peacefulness within also helps. And we know that healers are typically people who have suffered themselves in such a way that they are able to feel the pain of others and help to heal it.

The Hard Work, The Letting Go.   The pathway to becoming a pathway of love seems to require first a pattern of hard and sustained effort followed by a letting go. The letting go is what Rilke is talking about in the stanza from his poem, "The Visionary."  First we fight, he suggests, and then we "let ourselves be conquered."
   The remaining question becomes, conquered by what? Many give way to hate. Others give way to indifference, boredom, or quick fixes. The great healers, whether famous or anonymous, give way to love, and let God’s light shine through them.

-Erie Chapman

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7 responses to “How Healer’s Heal – Letting Go of Ego”

  1. Mary Jean Powell, MSW Avatar
    Mary Jean Powell, MSW

    This is a very insightful essay – one of your best. I know you are right in your analysis of healing. It is hard, if not impossible, to let go of ego. But every so often, when mine slips away for a moment, I notice later that it was a time when I was truly helping someone else. Today, you have helped heal me with your words. Thank you.

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  2. Karen York Avatar
    Karen York

    We so often block our own success by being so caught up with our own success. If we define success as achieving great wealth or lofty positions, often ego is the driving force behind that. But if we define success as leaving the world a better place than when we entered, or by having someone say that their life was better because of our influence, then ego is secondary, and love rules the day.
    Karen

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  3. liz Wessel RN, MS SJHS Home Health Network, Orange, CA Avatar
    liz Wessel RN, MS SJHS Home Health Network, Orange, CA

    In order to give love we must be open to receiving love, perhaps this is the energy of the dance between patient and caregiver. We create open space for the energy of spirit to transform our hearts. When we experience heartfelt concern for the suffering of another, our love is awakened and our spirits open to our hearts deepest longing, to be seen and recognized as one in the unity of God’s love.
    Loving care for others is the path where we can encounter God. We learn to abandon ourselves through a love that is not self-seeking but open-ended and boundless.
    These insights shared were gleaned from reading and contemplating the beautiful encyclical letter of Benedict XVI

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  4. Ellen Johnston, R.N. Avatar
    Ellen Johnston, R.N.

    This is a brilliant piece! I can’t, for the life of me, figure out why you don’t get 20 comments a day. Your writing is spectacular and I think you are a great gift to care givers.
    Thank you!

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  5. Angie Bermudez, RN. CSUF BSN Student, Mission Hospital RN Avatar
    Angie Bermudez, RN. CSUF BSN Student, Mission Hospital RN

    The capacity to act as channels of love… What an inspiring thought. The power of touch, compassion, tending to the sick, and being there for some one in need are wonderful gifts we are given as caregivers. Allowing ourselves to be conquered by the power of love, by being open to transmitting God’s love and receiving it, as well as surrendering ourselves to love is the ultimate challenge..

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  6. Erie Chapman Avatar
    Erie Chapman

    Thanks so each of you for your kind comments about this reflection.
    -Erie

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  7. Desmond Avatar

    nice article. thanks for sharing.

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