During the war, tears had fallen into disuse, like words, like sugar. You couldn’t afford to give up tears for anyone. – Helen Fremont in her book, After Long Silence
The words Fremont uses refer to the numbness of ghetto-trapped Jews in World War II Poland. The hardships were unimaginable. Emotions were redefined by constant fear and the unrelenting terror of searing brutalities.
But caregivers can relate to Fremont’s words. They know those days when tragedy piles on tragedy and the heart exhausts itself to the point where tears may "fall into disuse" for awhile.
In large hospices people die everyday. Can caregivers "afford" to be almost perpetually in tears?…
The frequency of tragedy in small charities and large hospitals calls leaders and team members to create networks of support for each other. Otherwise, tears may dry up never to return.
As the best leaders focus on taking care of the people who take care of people, they learn the need for respite and relief. This is why laughter is so important, sometimes in the grimmest of circumstances. And this is why team members need to form themselves into hammocks to catch each other and to rest.
Yes, caregivers can shed tears whenever the situation calls for it, if they receive from their work settings the kind of caring circle group support we advance as part of the work of Radical Loving Care.
How is your setting doing at offering care to you? What else could all of us do to create the kind of space that allows for the healing of the wounds we experience as we help others heal?
-Erie Chapman
Journal of Sacred Work 
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