Journal of Sacred Work

Note: On the fifth anniversary of
9/11, a column on humor may seem odd. There wasn’t much funny that
happened on that terrible day in 2001. On this anniversary, however, I
was struck by the comment from the young daughter of one of the
victims, broadcast on CBS. She said she was trying to figure out what could make her happy again. "Then I realized," she said, "that the thing that would
make me happy was helping other people."
   What wisdom. What a great message for all of us.
Now, in the middle of hard memories, here is an essay honoring humor and some leaders who discovered ways to express it.

Take your work seriously, not yourself.  –  Senator Robert Kennedy

 We’re all vulnerable to it. We go through lots of education and training and one day we arrive in the role of caregiver. We are entrusted with the care of another. It’s a big responsibility and carries with it a measure of power. Soon we may fall victim to thinking our work is so important that we must be also. This leads to the condition reflected in the line above. We begin taking ourselves seriously as well as our work. In the middle of grim times, we may lose balance…   

   If the condition really gets out of hand, we may fall victim to some
version of the "God Complex." In this state, we think we are more
important than anyone else. It’s pretty hard to remember we’re one of
the grains of sand if we subconsiously think we’re big shots.
   I first heard the line about not taking ourselves as seriously as our work from the late Senator Robert F. Kennedy. I think Kennedy quoted the line because he knew that at times in his own career he had fallen victim to taking himself too seriously. He seemed to do this during both the McCarthy and the Hoffa hearings in the 1950s.
     By the time his brother became President, he seemed to have learned a better sense of self-deprecating humor. Perhaps some of his brother’s own keen wit rubbed off on Bobby. Instead of being embarrassed about the idea of appointing his own brother as Attorney General in 1961, President Kennedy joked that he had considered making the announcement by peeking out of the door at 2 a.m. and whispering, "It’s Bobby."
   Another great illustration of JFK’s self-deprecating humor is reflected in his response to a teenager who asked him, during the presidential campaign of 1960, how he became a hero. If Kennedy had taken himself very seriously, he might have launched into a story about his heroism after the sinking of the PT boat he commanded. Instead, he simply said, "It was involuntary.They sank my boat."
   Similarly, at a $100-a-plate luncheon Kennedy said, "I could say I’m deeply touched. But not as deeply touched as you have been in coming to this luncheon."
   Abe Lincoln, arguably our greatest president, was famous for his wit, as demonstrated in this light comment at the oppening to one of his speeches. "I have stepped out upon this platform that I may see you and that you may see me, and int he arrangement I have the best of the bargain."
   Lincoln is also the one who said: "Nearly all men can stand adversity, but if you want to test a man’s character, give him power." And that is part of the point of this sixth principle. Humor helps keep us in balance. Self-deprecating humor, along with our own wilingness to take jokes about
ourselves, is one of the great ways of retaining humility.
   Caregiving work can be awfully grim. Retaining our sense of humor has a way of keeping us humble, and of helping us stay balanced so that we can give our best energy to people in need. It’s awfully hard to laugh and be angry at the same time. An humor is one of the best weapons against frustration and burnout.
   If you think you’ve been taking yourself seriously as well as your work, consider the wisdom of this principle. Begin practicing it by trying out jokes about yourself on yourself.
   All of us have funny truths about us, don’t we? In my own case, for example, my hair is thinning so rapidly I don’t need a hair dryer anymore. All I do is ask my wife to blow on my wet hair a couple times and it’s dry.