Journal of Sacred Work

Caregivers have superpowers! Radical Loving Care illuminates the divine truth that caregiving is not just a job. It is Sacred Work.

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"Not to be on to something is to be in despair." – Walker Percy in The Moviegoer

Seeds
   I repeat the above quote from yesterday’s Journal entry because I think it’s so important. As obvious as it sounds, there’s not much point in beginning any effort, or living life itself, unless we have some idea of purpose. The purpose of the New Garden of Loving Care is to grow it as a place that will help us Live Love, not fear. Every seed, and every plant that grows from it, must nurture us in our desire to Live Love.
   How much of your life is lived afraid? It is difficult for most of us to calculate this. This is because we are, quite literally, afraid to consider how much many of our life decisions are fear-driven.
   Each day, countless mid-level executives and first line staff avoid speaking the truth for fear of being punished or, God forbid, fired. I have often said that my heart breaks for anyone who comes to work each day afraid of their supervisor.
   There is a solution to this kind of fear….

   The solution is easy to speak and challenging to live. It starts with the question, To whom do you report?
   If you answered in your head with the name of some Vice President or other leader, you’ve started on the wrong foot. No one passionate about caregiving reports to a "boss." Caregivers report to patients. It is the patient’s welfare for which caregivers live.
Sunflower_seeds
   This is the power of purpose. If my purpose is to please my supervisor, it is likely that I may make many mistakes in the care of my patient. What if the boss wants me to spend less time with patients and more time with paperwork? What if the boss wants me to cut back on patient care based on budget concerns rather than on what is best for caregiving?
   Embedding myself in purposeful caregiving means that the patient or client’s needs always come first. Beyond this bubbles the wellspring of Love. For when we report to patients, we are reporting to Love.
   God is Love. Love is God. If we live in the energy of Love, we cannot fail.
   But what if this means we get fired? I know this fear haunts all of us and it has sometimes haunted me in my many years of leadership in healthcare. All I can tell you is that I’ve been fired a total of three times, two of them because of mergers. Each time has been hard. Each time, however, I’ve alway learned some deeper about the idea of purpose.
   Success teaches us very little. Setbacks teach us so much about the importance of purpose as the seed we need to nurture.
   Pick a purpose that counts. Don’t pick money as your purpose or you are sure to live your life unfulfilled. I know we all need a certain amount of money. Usually, we need less than we think. But money can never satisfy the deep needs of our souls.
   The real wealth of life comes from attaching ourselves to meaningful work. It comes from  living dedicated to things in which we believe, not things which our supervisors believe.
   Is there anything more important than Love? I don’t think so. The question for each of us becomes: How do we connect our lives with Love’s energy? What do we need to do to move away from fear and draw closer to the force of Love?
   Planting and growing the Garden of Loving Care calls us to engage in certain spiritual practices. One of these practices is to carefully consider our fears and how much we are allowing these fears to dominate our lives. If we live in a high purpose, fear cannot deter us.
   The only effective antidote to fear is Love. We can’t banish fear by telling ourselves not to be afraid. Instead, we need to replace fear with Love. Finding our purpose gives us a compass and a pathway to live out the calling of Love.
   Lot of the challenge lies with asking ourselves what this means for us. I am chronically plagued by my enormous difficulty in letting go of ego in order to engage Love. I find myself deeply disappointed by my inclination to engage in self-indulgent behavior and my occasional tendency to want to control the lives of others – especially the lives of those I love most. Instead, true leadership guides, encouraged and sets an example for others to follow.
   Why is Love hard for so many of us? I don’t think it’s because we’re sinners. I have never accepted the notion that to be human is to be a sinner. For me, to be human means to accept the idea that we are all flawed. Attaching shame to this simply compounds the problem and layers guilt on top of guilt. I often think that’s what shame is – guilt on top of guilt.
   There is no room for shame in the garden of Love. The seed of purpose thrives when that purpose is connected to serving others. Each loving caregiver is blessed with the enormous energy of knowing that the very definition of their work is connected to serving others.
   Celebrate your purpose in life. And know that God is Love.

-Erie Chapman

Thanks to each of you who are contributing your thoughts to this effort to lay out plans for planting the Garden of Love. How many seeds you need for your own garden is up to you. We know that we need at least one – it is the seed of Love. And from this, perhaps the whole garden can grow. What we know is that whether growing one seed, seven, or a thousand, growing needs constant nurturing.

Spiritual challenges:

1) Should Purpose be the important first seed in the Garden of Love?
2) If not, what seed should replace it? (In the future, we will be talking about seeds of Potential, Passion, Prayer, Presence, Positivity and Persistence.)
3) What would you say is the principle purpose of your life?

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8 responses to “The First Seed in the Garden of Love – Purpose”

  1. Edwin Loftin Avatar
    Edwin Loftin

    When considering the challenge of what important seed should be first I ask if this is the right question? Is there a first and last seed or do each of the seeds of purpose, potential, prayer, presence, positivity, persistence, courage, and love all have similar value. My anallogy would be a circle of chain. Which link is first, last, stronger weaker? For the Chain of Loving Care each link must carry similar value and importance.
    This, I propose, is the same for the Garden of Loving Care. Each seed, sunflower, pea, or pumpkin is part of the beauty and strength of the Garden as a whole.

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  2. Erie Chapman Avatar
    Erie Chapman

    This is an excellent point, Edwin. I’m inclined to agree with you that each seed, although different, is of equal value. The circle is a good image as well.

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  3. liz Wessel Avatar
    liz Wessel

    I love your analogy of the circle, Ed, with each link as important in contributing to the greater whole. I am partial to the imagery of the sacred circle which to me is symbolizes of God; there is no beginning and there is no end. I believe that the seed of purpose is foundational because it provides clarity and helps to focus and center ourselves. Perhaps, it is the focal point of the circle, our center, our place of unity. When we know in the core of our being that our purpose is to Love in service to others, then we can move out in any direction with greater assurance. When we follow our hearts’ desire, we know Love will guide us and help us to find the way.

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  4. Erie Chapman Avatar
    Erie Chapman

    I agree with your comments on purpose, Liz. Dr. Victor Frankl made it the centerpiece of his entire philosophy he called logotherapy – or “Purpose Therapy.”
    In our case, the center of our work is Love so that purpose becomes, as you point out, the seed that helps us focus our energy. Where attention goes, energy flows. And purpose prioritizes our attention on Love.

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  5. Karen York Avatar
    Karen York

    When I read the question, “to whom do you report?” neither my boss nor our patients came first to mind. My focus turned inward to that force within me that helps me get up each day to face the world. If I had to name it, I suppose it would be love/god. I was challenged a few years ago to write my intention statement. It came out something like this – “My intention is to be a source of inspiration and a healing presence to all within my sphere of influence”. I suppose intention here can be rephrased as purpose, so I agree that purpose is the foundation and the other “p’s” are perhaps cultivated in the direction of our purpose.

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  6. Edwin Loftin Avatar
    Edwin Loftin

    Erie, thank you for refering to Dr Frankl.
    “Between stimulus and response there is a space. In that space is our power to choose our response. In our response lies our growth and our freedom.”
    This quote from Dr Frankl carries much depth for me.
    And here it is that space that allows us the opportunity to Live Love Not Fear; here we make a choice of what seed to plant in our Garden; here we check to see if the soil has been prepared and are we prepared to nurture it to maturity.

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  7. Catherine Self Avatar
    Catherine Self

    Victor Frankl left us a powerful message about meaning and purpose. His reminder of Nietszche’s words, “he who has a why, can bear almost any how,” is important to my focus on purpose. Meaning and purpose remind us of the vision of what could be.
    Eckhart suggested that the hope of loving or being loved is what allows us to endure. We who have tasted the power of Love know that it’s purpose is not just to allow us to endure, but to also flourish and grow.
    As i was reading your thoughts and analogies, I thought of the aspen grove – these are not individual trees but evidence of intertwined roots of a single organism. The redwood trees likewise intertwine their roots and are thus able to mutually support their towering presence.
    I am so grateful to each of you for your contribution and the intertwining of ideas!

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  8. Victoria Facey Avatar
    Victoria Facey

    Thank you for the continued dialogue on this subject. I originally backed away from it, as I didn’t understand the spiritual content. Liz (Wessel) took my hand,explained it to me, and I’m back!
    I choose the first seed to be purpose; this is my anchor to almost everything I do. My purpose is to put love in what I do and to step up to the plate. I think of this almost every day I wake up.
    Purpose is what drives me, Love is what feeds me and Hope is what inspires me.

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