A man, yet by these tears a little boy again,
Throwing myself on the sand, confronting the waves,…
-Walt Whitman (1819-1892) from "I Sign The Body Electric"
I grew up, like some of our readers, near the Pacific, "throwing myself on the sand, confronting the waves" and now have the great chance to do the same, once again. This time it is by the Atlantic, where I encounter the waves with my tiny granddaughter and wonder what storms she will meet.
Most caregivers live their careers between the coasts, confronting and healing the waves of pain that wash over others. Along the way, I wonder how many of us pause to reflect upon our memories of work?
Each of us lives so much of our lives in the middle of our jobs rather than at home. When our work nears its end or reaches it, what will you remember? Will you recall the joys of working alongside friends? Which patients will stand out in your recollection?
When I was a little boy playing by the ocean, I dreamed of one day doing important things. What I think of as important now is different from what I conjured in my boyhood imagination. As Whitman writes:
From those beginning notes of yearning and love there in
the mist,
From the thousand responses of my heart never to cease,…
From the word stronger and more delicious than any,
From such as now they start the scene revisiting,..
Behind closed eyes I am easily able to revisit my first days as a hospital leader. I can see the associate nursing director, Marian Hamm, who remains my friend to this day, greeting me in a hallway at Riverside Hospital in 1975.
Now, in the blink of an eye, she is seventy-five years old. What Marian and I discuss is not the daily census or staff morale. Instead, we reminisce – about challenges we dealt with in two different hospital settings; about characters who amazed us with their odd behavior; about battles with doctors; about disputes within staff and various scandals; about how we handled several different emergencies.
Most of all, we revel in the fact that, for a time, we had the chance to influence the lives of others for the better. We had the opportunity to build cultures of loving care. I am so grateful we took that chance.
One day, if you are lucky, you will have the time to reflect on your confrontations with the waves.
Meanwhile, as Whitman wrote,
I, chanter of pains and joys, uniter of here and hereafter,… A reminiscence sing.
What do you think you will remember most about your work life?
-Erie Chapman
With my two sisters on the beach at Santa Monica, circa 1950
Journal of Sacred Work 
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