Journal of Sacred Work

Caregivers have superpowers! Radical Loving Care illuminates the divine truth that caregiving is not just a job. It is Sacred Work.

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Soloist    Nathaniel Anthony Ayers, Jr. can play Beethoven on the cello with the gift of a naturally blessed musician who has struggled to develop his talent. But, his audience, until recently, was made up of homeless folks on the streets of Los Angeles. "I'm not always sure what's going on," Ayers says through the voice of actor Jamie Foxx in the new movie, The Soloist, based on the true story of the lives of Ayers and Steven Lopez, the L.A. Times columnist who brought Ayers story to public attention. The problem for Mr. Ayers is that the blessing of his talent is counterbalanced by the terrible curse of schizophrenia. For most of his life, Ayers has lived in another world, a world occupied with voices over which he has no control.
   As a caregiver, you will have encountered perhaps many who live different worlds. I speak not only of Alzheimer's patients but of typical patients as they fall under the influence of anethesia, alcohol or other mind-altering drugs.   
   Meet my new friend Don. Don has a gift. He can recall the batting averages of most major league baseball players and how each team did, whether the match was yesterday or maybe a few years ago. He can do the same "trick" with football. I didn't ask him about other sports. But I know that most of Don's day is occupied thinking about sports. So what? Isn't that true of lots of people?
   The problem is, Don doesn't know how to answer questions in a typical job interview. This is because most of his brain functions at a level most experts would describe as about second grade.
   Don's friend Billy has a gift for remembering people's names. This would seem like a handy talent. Again, a problem arises when you put Billy's ability in a setting run by people like you and me. When I met Billy, he immediately wanted to know not just my name but the exact spelling. When he got it straight, he turned to his fifteen or so colleagues in the day program at Progress, Inc (a Nashville charity) and shouted very loudly, "Hey everybody, THIS IS ERIE CHAPMAN!" "He'll remember your name forever," Donna Goodacre, head of the Center told me. Come back in ten years and he'll shout, "Hi, Mr. Chapman!"
   The folks at Progress, Inc are used to Billy. None of them responded to his announcement of my arrival. They are each living in their own consciousness and their different world leaves them isolated from the existence most people inhabit.
   How do we, as caregivers, build bridges for these afflicted beings so that they may join our "world?" Sometimes we can't. Sometimes, it's better if we don't even try. The consciousness of our world is not always a place we enjoy ourselves. And that is why some who have been traumatized by life develop amnesia or other ways of escape.
   What we can bring to Nathaniel and Don and Billy, and to each other, is the unique gift of Love. Love can be so difficult to find and offer when the patient before us is occupying an awareness far from anything we know.
   There are so many stories like the one portrayed in the movie. Schizophrenia afflicts a member of my extended family who is "fine," according to her sister, when "the voices leave her alone." My cousin Ronnie was born just hours before me in 1943. His mother's case of German Measles meant that Ronnie would be permanently deaf and unable to speak as well as profoundly challenged mentally. Another aunt of mine fell off the delivery table during the birth of my cousin, Doug. That was fifty years ago. Doug is "fine" according to his family. If you met him, you would like him. And, you would also know, instantly, that there is something "different" about Doug. He occupies a different world.
   Perhaps all of us do.

-Erie Chapman

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5 responses to “Days 124 & 125 – Other Worlds”

  1. Melissa Scott Avatar
    Melissa Scott

    I went with my community to The Soloist last night and wept like a baby. I loved the whole movie.
    There is a part in the movie where Lopez( Robert Downey Jr) gives up, on life. He says he resigns from everything and that in his hopes for redemption for Ayers, he ends up unconscionably trying to redeem himself.
    I deeply, painfully identify with that. I always am running around trying to love others and it usually somewhere along the way gets infected by my own selfishness, even in the purest of intentions.
    The thing I love about Nataniel Ayers9Jamie Foxx) and all broken people. Is there is God within all of us! And he/she is just waiting to be found. We are all trapped in conditions and bodies that fall short of representing Gods true beauty. If you have the patience to look beyond the surface you may find it . I have many times over and over!

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  2. ~liz Wessel Avatar
    ~liz Wessel

    I appreciate your insights, Melissa.
    This meditation calls to mind Jean Vanier founder of L’Arche communities, a man who has dedicated his life to living in loving community with people who have severe intellectual disabilities. His book “Becoming Human” offers wonderful insights that lead us to your premise, Erie, that Love is the answer.
    The following are teachings from Vanier’s experiences of helping people transition from institutions into communal living. Vanier speaks of the intense loneliness, feelings of chaos, and of being cut off for those who are different. They are strangers among us and as humans; we have a natural desire to want to turn away from weakness. For all of us carry brokenness within and a shadow side that we would prefer to keep hidden. Vanier states, “we can’t constantly love, be attentive and non-violent. Weakness speaks to us of the ultimate powerlessness of death itself.”
    Vanier elaborates further, “To reveal someone’s beauty is to reveal their value by giving them time, attention and tenderness. We can express this revelation through our open and gentle presence, the way we look, listen, speak and care for others. The belief in the inner beauty of each human being is at the heart of L’Arche, at the heart of all true education and the heart of being human. As soon as we start selecting and judging people instead of welcoming them as they are, we reduce life rather than foster it. Fear is at the root of all exclusion, and trust, inclusion. A cry out from weakness with trust can open hearts. Discovery of our common humanity liberates us from self-compulsions and inner hurts. As we open to others and allow ourselves to be concerned with their condition society must also change and become more open.”
    This also leads me back to last weeks Journal meditations on shared pain. When we can connect our experiences to others we can move beyond “self” into authentic relationship, recognizing our shared humanity, and understanding we are bound to one another in Love.

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  3. Melissa Scott Avatar
    Melissa Scott

    Thanks Liz! I love Jean vanier

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  4. Victoria Facey Avatar
    Victoria Facey

    I saw the story of “The Soloist” on a segment of “60 Minutes” and I’m also looking forward to seeing the movie. It’s amazing to learn how each person has a gift. In the case of schizophrenia, it is often the “mixed blessing”, or what I see as the rose AND the thorns. Most people are offended (or afraid?) and rarely stay around long enough to see the beauty, or gift in these tortured individuals.
    Erie, Melissa, and Liz, thank you for sharing your thoughts on this subject. Maybe this movie will open the door for us to peek in, and perhaps get help for this unique community.

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  5. ~liz Wessel Avatar
    ~liz Wessel

    It is good to have you back Victoria!
    I am also reminded of my first job in healthcare. I was seventeen and I worked at the Brattleboro retreat in Vermont as a psychiatric technician. I often worked on the adolescent locked ward. As a teenager myself I related to residents more as friends rather than patients. Sometimes, the psychiatrist would ask me my opinion about treatment regimes. I was surprised because I really had no clue, only the ability to relate to my peers. It was an invaluable experience that I will never forget the people I met there. Three of the youths wound up committing suicide after they left the facility or went home on a w/e pass. That was devastating.
    Ten years years later I was walking along the boardwalk of Laguna Beach and I happened to meet up with one of the residents I had been close to. What are the odds of that happening? It seemed more than a random coincidence, 3000 miles away, on that particular day, time, and at that location. I love when those rare, strange occurances happen in life.

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