Journal of Sacred Work

"You cannot find peace by avoiding life, Leonard." The character of Virginia Woolf speaking to her husband in the film "The Hours."

   A young man approached an old man and asked him, "Do you still wrestle with the Devil?" The old man answered, "No, the Devil has grown old like me. I wrestle with God."

   "Do you hope to win?" the young man asked. "No," the old man replied, "I hope to lose."

   Why do we think we can find peace by hiding from life instead of wrestling with it? Why do we so often hide in fear instead of living Love's passion?

   Probably, we often choose to flee life because our fear of pain is greater than our faith in Love.

   When my doctor told me at age nineteen that I had Crohn's Disease, he followed that news by warning me that I needed to live "as quiet and stress-free a life as possible." When I told him I wanted to be a lawyer, he replied, "Absolutely not. That is far too stressful."

   As I have shared in the Journal before, I am grateful that I ignored him (click on "About" below my photo, above right.) Following the doctor's warning would have been, for me, like choosing fear and "avoiding life."

   The sacred life is lived by engaging the world through listening to our passion and living our calling. Caregivers engage the world of illness, suffering, death, and birth every day.

   So many routinely ask nurses, doctors and other therapists how they can possibly live in the difficult atmosphere of illness and injury. We know the best answer. The work is sacred because it involves the chance to heal deep need.

   In fact, living a sacred life is easy to describe for everyone and difficult to live for most. It involves bringing Love to every encounter. When we do this, God arrives and God's presence always brings Love.

   I write and speak about the subject of Love and loving care all the time. Yet, I am forever having to remind myself to live Love's grace instead of giving into my own fears and biases. 

   After writing some of the greatest literature of the twentieth century, Virginia Woolf (1882-1941) above left, ultimately went against her own advice. On March 28, 1941, profoundly weary of the world, she placed stones in her coat pockets and drowned herself in England's river Ouse. "I can't fight (the world) any longer," Woolf wrote in her suicide note to her husband.

   Virginia's Woolf's death was a heartbreaking loss for a world she could no longer abide.Yet, the point is that this valiant and eloquent woman did live a sacred life until the very end. Her writing clearly reflects this.

   Rev. Mark Caldwell delivered a Sunday sermon recently based on Genesis 32:22-32 – Jacob's famous wrestling match at Peniel. The text reflects that the man who fought with Jacob told him, "…you have striven with God and with humans and have prevailed." Did Jacob "prevail" with God through surrender? 

   Rev. Caldwell finished his sermon with a line I hope to inscribe in my heart. "We live on the edge of what's left of us and what's left for us.

   What is left for us? We have the chance to choose our answer every minute of every day. We can engage life with passion or we can try to avoid it.

   I believe there is no hiding from Love. We need to wrestle with God…and lose.

-Rev. Erie Chapman