Journal of Sacred Work

Caregivers have superpowers! Radical Loving Care illuminates the divine truth that caregiving is not just a job. It is Sacred Work.

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 “When your absence is felt, your presence is the essence and it makes a difference.” -Michael Bassey Johnson

Mom essenceIt seems that a person’s true essence crystalizes at the end of one’s life. We see more clearly, threads woven in each others lives to create unique and intricate designs. As our lives cross we may not realize the significance of our touch upon one another, however brief or extended our encounters.

A person may leave but their essence lingers with us. I have witnessed a curious phenomenon that can happen after someone we love dies. Sometimes those who remain begin to display mannerisms, behaviors, sayings and even actions of that person.

Perhaps, this occurs because their love lives on within us.  It may be one way we fill the void and remember them in our being.

It evolved almost imperceptibly. He became the caregiver that his mom had been. He is no longer living for himself. Woody, generously gives his time and energy doing helpful deeds for others.

My brother recently commented to me, I’ve become just like dad”, and I've noticed this rings true more and more over time.

I spent many an hour at her bedside. As I stroked her forehead I couldn’t help but notice how beautiful she looked. As she lay in that in between stage of leave taking,  she was no longer responsive. I leaned in close to her ear and said, “Mom it is going to be so beautiful in paradise and you are going to be so happy and filled with joy.” I was so surprised when she laughed with joy. I continued, “Mom paradise is beautiful and you are so happy and joyful.” Again, she laughed and affirmed this vision; a moment I will carry with me.

We are inextricably connected in ways that surpasses our understanding, for we are bound by Love. Living in the physical realm we can easily forget and perceive ourselves as separate. This leads to loneliness and a deep longing to return to wholeness. At times the veil lifts and we see ourselves in each other’s eyes; we see through our Beloved's eyes.

“The essence of any creature encompasses more than one realm. Here now this body is a vehicle of our essence in this universe.” –Toba Beta

My mother's leave taking has left me  icreasingly aware and valuing relationships and the people who intersect my universe. My priorities are shifting and the busyness that seemed so important, is less so.

My only hope is that my mother’s radiant essence lives on in me.

Liz Sorensen Wessel

Photo of my mom, taken by my dad; Elizabeth (Lee) Sorensen February 17, 1916—August 20th 2014 

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13 responses to “Days 252-253 Essence”

  1. sherry Avatar
    sherry

    Liz,
    your opening quote is so true a paradox.
    this quote was shared with me by a dear friend when my little sister died.
    Every birth is a condensation,every death a dispersal. Birth is not a gain, death is not a loss…when condensed, Qi becomes a living being, when dispersed it is the substratum of mutations.
    -Zang Zai 1020-1077AD
    prayers and blessings
    Sherry

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  2. Woody wessel Avatar
    Woody wessel

    Beautiful Liz, And a great shot of your Mom.

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  3. Maria Doglio Avatar

    Liz, I believe your mother’s radiant essence has lived within you long before Lee took her final bow… and now it will shine even more so through you. Sentiments beautifully expressed. Your experience at the end gave you witness of the paradise your Mom was feeling and seeing, I believe. Amazing affirmation of the freedom, love and beauty that awaits us.

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  4. Erie Chapman Foundation Avatar

    This remembrance of your mom is so eloquent it is universal in its appeal. You brought your mom’s essence to this writing so that all of us can sense her beauty. You are right that “…love lives on within us. It may be one way we fill the void and remember them in our being.”

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  5. bill.gayle@gmail.com Avatar
    bill.gayle@gmail.com

    Liz, I can’t contribute any more than what has already been posted – beautiful words and sentiments

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  6. bill.gayle@gmail.com Avatar
    bill.gayle@gmail.com

    Liz, I can’t contribute anything more that what has already been posted – beautiful expression of your love for your Mom

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  7. julie laverdiere Avatar
    julie laverdiere

    Dear Liz, so sorry to hear of your loss. You have a lot of wonderful memories, and their essence is forever present. My mom was one of the kindest people I ever knew. When I see someone doing a kind act, I immediately think of her, and thank God she taught me that. Blessings

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  8. swaligur@yahoo.com Avatar

    Yes, indeed, her radiance lives on…
    Blessings,
    Macushla

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  9. Maureen McDermott Avatar
    Maureen McDermott

    As my heart goes out to you Liz as you mourn the death of a much loved and loving Mom I am caught up in the wonder of your words and the hope they contain. Yes,how true are your introductory words, “When your absence is felt, your presence is the essence and it makes a difference.” -Michael Bassey Johnson. May the ‘new’ presence of your Mom give you hope, encouragement and peace.
    What a wonderful photo, bringing memories of your Dad and Mom together.
    Thank you for your sharing, Liz.

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  10. shirley Avatar
    shirley

    Liz I think you are your Mom’s essence and I have little doubt she learned from you also. I love to catch a glimpse of my Mom when I look in the mirror sometimes. And it’s fun to hear my brother say how much like my mom or dad my mannerisms are. We carry them with us forever. Yesterday at school Emily smelled the fragrance of my Mom’s washing of clothes and for the first time remember how her hugs felt. I love your Mom’s laughter as your describe paradise for her. How sweet she must have been to give us you, and then you give us her and her life goes on.

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  11. sbeng Avatar
    sbeng

    LIz: beautiful photo of your mum. It was so timely that you could spend her last days with her,I believe your mum’s radiant essence lives in you. Thank you for such a beautiful reflection.

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  12. Jonathan Ang Avatar
    Jonathan Ang

    I, myself, have started to slowly notice subtle things I do on a daily basis that I have picked up from my parents. Small things such as the way I smile, the way I eat, and the way I converse with other people. And lately, the way I formulate my thoughts as well. Growing up, I tried to think differently and would have different opinions on things. It seems I have slowly realized and appreciated their views as I grow older and incorporate my own. It’s true their love lives on within us. I hope to pass it on in the future.

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  13. ~liz Avatar
    ~liz

    I just wish to express my deep appreciation to each of you.
    love,
    ~liz

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