Journal of Sacred Work

Caregivers have superpowers! Radical Loving Care illuminates the divine truth that caregiving is not just a job. It is Sacred Work.

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Former President & CEO of multiple hospital systems and founding president & CEO of 20-hospital OhioHealth, best selling author, film artist, ordained minister, composer, published poet, syndicated T.V. host, trial attorney, federal prosecutor and Municipal Court Judge. Erie is internationally known as the founder of the Radical Loving Care(R)movement. He also heads Erie Chapman Foundation, Dane Dakota Productions, LLC, and Chapman Health International, Inc.

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Days 153-157 – Celebrating Others

May 30, 2017

The phenomenon challenges countless relationships: We share an achievement with someone & before we finish we know right away: They either do not care or are envious. We know because they either dismiss our news or instantly respond with something that happened to them.

Even when someone says "I'm glad for you" part of me sometimes wonders, "Does that mean they are sad for themselves?"

With other friends the opposite is true. The enlightened celebrate whatever good flows into life. These are the same people who grieve with us in ways that tell us they are suffering with us as opposed to secretly congratulating themselves that they are not afflicted.

Poet Nayyirah Waheed captures this brilliantly:

some people

when they hear

your story

contract.

others

upon hearing your story

expand

and that is how

you

know.

Upon hearing a friend's child has won an award it is natural to compare our children. What is tougher is to move beyond polite support to actually celebrating the successes of others.

When we do that a surprise arrives: The moment we share the best in ourselves we feel better as well.

-Erie Chapman

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5 responses to “Days 153-157 – Celebrating Others”

Terry Chapman

May 30, 2017

Yes, how true! I just sent a farewell email to a good friend, who used to live in Canada, and migrated to America years ago. He is moving to Gettysburg, Pa. Andrew has always listened patiently to my Canadian ancestor stories, and frequently given me sage advice on how to proceed in my research.
He has plenty of stories about himself, but usually waits for a distinct pause on my part, before sharing them. Together, we always have an enjoyable discourse–each making equal contributions–each truly interested in the other’s views.
If only more people I know, and I include myself, of course, in our impatience to share, would take one deep breath, pause, and then speak out; we’d all have more satisfying and productive interactions!

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Jude

May 30, 2017

Sometimes all you need in this life is someone who listens and not only listens but hears you.

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~liz Wessel

May 30, 2017

I appreciate Jude and Terry’s response; true listening is an art and the greatest gift we can offer another human being. I can see within myself both contracted and expanded ways of being in relationship. Most especially, I appreciate your honesty in calling this out Erie and helping us to take pause and notice… if we can stay in the present moment we can be a healing presence as well as receive healing.

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Todd Meador

May 31, 2017

What an interesting observation. Enjoyed reading this piece and the thought provoking comments. When people share their stories with me I tend to naturally put myself in their shoes so the outcome, experience or challenges feel very personal. The wins become my wins and the struggles my struggles. This is comes naturaly but may make me a better listener than I should be.
Thanks for sharing Erie.

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maryjane

June 15, 2017

thank you for this.

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